I love my mom.

I care about her, and cherish her. 

But I don't want to see her try to gain self-worth by losing weight. 

My mom is re-starting Weight Watchers today, and that honestly made my heart fall a bit. I know that it won't work in the long run, it won't be something she can maintain. I want her to feel the joy and happiness I feel in intuitive eating. I want her to set her chains free from food, from self-worth, etc. I want her to be happy with her body now, rather than believe she will be happy with it later when she loses weight. She saw the look I had when she said that, and said, "Michelle, it works for me." And I really want to sit down with her and tell her it won't work in the long run, and won't make her happy. I really want her to be happy, and feel free from all of the chains of restriction and unhappiness. I want her to be happy with herself now. She's beautiful. She may not see it, but who ever said that curves and stretch marks, and being a little bigger wasn't beautiful? 

Should I step in and tell her to really try intuitive eating, and that weight watchers won't work in the long run? Should I tell her about the dangers of dieting and restricting? What should i do?

Should I step in?

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Michelle, while I truly believe that a person's IE journey is one of the most wonderful gifts we can give to ourselves, it also seems to be a gift we must choose for ourselves. If you do want to say something to your mom, simply tell her what you said in your post -

" I really want her to be happy, . . . She's beautiful . . . She may not see it, but who ever said that curves and stretch marks, and being a little bigger wasn't beautiful?"

Then tell her that you will support her. As your IE journey gets going, be open and prepared to share with her your experiences with it.

I also would like to add how it seems that as we discover IE for ourselves, we often have an irresistible urge to share this life reaffirming process with all that we know, love and wish the best for. But that zeal is better directed towards one's own IE efforts than trying to get others to 'join in'. The reality is that those others still do judge 'success' in a outwardly oriented manner and will only see that the IE newbie is off on 'another (dieting) tangent' which that the dieter measures in weight, size etc.

Best wishes for everyone, no matter what path they chose. 


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